Mandy Garner: Intrusion into grief

This article was originally published by the Working Mums website, and is republished here with permission and thanks.

By Mandy Garner (t: @workmumontherun)

Last year I took out a complaint with the Independent Press Standards Organisation (IPSO) after the Daily Mail published the CCTV footage of my daughter’s last moments the morning after her death with a lurid clickbait headline – just as we were trying to explain to our other children what had happened. I complained that it was an intrusion into grief and therefore in breach of IPSO’s code on this. I thought it was an open and closed case.

Clearly, it was a breach. If it wasn’t, what actually would constitute a breach?

There then followed months of me having to respond to the Daily Mail’s ‘defence’ of their actions. Each time I had to do so was extremely upsetting. I told IPSO this. They suggested I might like to drop the case. I am not one to drop things that I believe are wrong, so on we went.

Eventually, several months later IPSO ruled that it was not a breach of their code. One of the reasons given was that you couldn’t make out my daughter’s face because the footage was ‘grainy’. The video was embedded in a story about her death. Three of my brothers saw it. They knew exactly who it was. My concern was that my children might view it – visual images stay with you much more than words. It cut off just before the moment of impact (‘sensitively’, said IPSO), but it is the bit before the impact that is perhaps the most difficult to view as a parent. It is the moment you go over and over in your mind, as you mentally try to save her again and again and again.

I have never viewed the CCTV footage. At the sentencing of the driver responsible for my daughter’s death, her boyfriend and friend who were there on the night and me and my partner left the courtroom. The driver himself refused to come to court, twice, which is another story.

I told IPSO that I found the whole process unnecessarily distressing and that, in my view, they had failed to uphold journalistic standards. They suggested I could train their liaison people how to handle people like me. It’s going to take a lot more than training. I went through IPSO’s cases for the previous five years and found only ONE case of a breach of the code on intrusion into grief, which had been upheld, one in which the Daily Mail (yes, them again) had admitted responsibility.

One IPSO official shared that she had personally been bereaved and could supposedly, therefore, understand my situation. The Mail was not at fault. It was in fact my fault for being bereaved. I am sure she is a perfectly nice person, but what is she doing defending such a system? In a way, it’s worse to have nice people upholding this stuff.

No aspect of the clickbait allegation was dealt with – that the video and the way it was presented was meant to get people to increases the clicks on that story. I have since been to the shop that sold the CCTV to the Mail. I felt I had to. I said that I was not angry with them, but I wanted to let them know that if they thought they were doing some good by selling it, they had certainly not done that and had added to the distress of my daughter’s family.

I don’t want to be doing this, but if I don’t who will?  I can’t stop it having happened to us, but I can try and stop it from happening to others. I am a journalist. We have a bad name, and sometimes rightly so. I want us to be better. It is in all of our interests to be better. I know it’s a drop in the ocean of all the problems with journalism today, but it is a drop in the ocean that I may be able to do something about.

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